YouTube has failed me

When The Office first started airing on NBC, I hated it. I couldn't get into it at all, despite the fact that I really liked the BBC version. This summer I feel in love with The Office during re-runs....mainly because of Jim. And Pam. And Dwight.

Last Night's "Gaydar" episode was flawless. I had tears coming out of my eyes by the end. Why is this not on YouTube yet? I need to share the video!

The YouTube community is immensly creative and you can usually find any video you want within a matter of hours after airing, but no OFFICE. A thousand Jim and Pam (or "Jam" as they are referred to) videos? Yes; but no Gaydar. YouTube has failed me.

What I am reading: For once, nothing.
What I am listening to: Sometime in the late 80's Rick Astley promised me that he would never give me up, let me down, run around and desert me. Today, via my colleague's radio, he is promising never to make me cry, say goodbye, tell a lie and hurt me. Yes, I remember all of the words. If you get me on a good day I may even replicate the dance from the video for you. Which I sadly still remember.

Addendum to the below

I just got a call from a friend who wanted to know if I would post pictures from Baltimore, or rather more specifically, from the events below.

Sorry, folks, I was too busy with the dressing and carrying to snap away. There will also be no pictures of me posted. Why? Because on Friday night I went to have my mustache waxed (don't even go there.....every woman I know over the age of 30 has facial hair) and I got burned. Literally. By hot wax.

And I walked around all weekend long with a burn on my upper lip. It is not a pretty site and yes, I know, I have no shame.

My Son May Be a Nudist (and other stories from Baltimore)

Some backstory:
We usually go to Danny's house once or twice a week for dinner. Danny has a small pool in his yard for Mr. Little Man to swim in. Throughout the course of the summer Mr. Little Man just kind of got to the point where he started swimming without trunks (shedding his clothes on his walk towards the pool). The backyard is completely secluded so I had no issue with him swimming in the nude. Danny predicted this would create a problem for me in the long run, but I did not believe him.

Fast forward to this weekend in Baltimore. We are walking through Harbor Place, enjoying the sites and just generally having a really nice time. We come upon a fountain and Mr. Little Man starts to strip. Apparently, he is going for a swim. I am, of course, completely HORRIFIED. The onlookers are giggling. I am not sure if they are laughing at us or if they are laughing because they think it is cute. After about 15 minutes of me fighting with him about his clothes (he is trying to take of his pants and I keep pulling them up) I had to physically remove him from the fountain. He doesn't care because, well, we are in Baltimore. At the Harbor. And we are surrounded by water. So if I won't allow him to swim in the actual fountain he can swim in the harbor. This led to an autistic tantrum of epic porportions. By the end of the meltdown I had to carry (CARRY!) him back to the hotel. I filled the tub and let him play while I consoled my nerves with a helping (or perhaps two) from the mini bar. The night ended with room service because Mr. Little Man was feeling the sting of being out in public.

Baltimore, Day 2. We decide to have breakfast at our hotel before heading off to the Aquarium. Incidentally, we are staying at the same hotel as the Oakland Raiders and some of the Baltimore Ravens. I asked the hostess to please try to sit us as far away from other people as possible because sometimes we have issues with food. And with people. So, as she is leading us to our table, past all the very, very large football players (who are all loading up with carbs. YUMMY.) I notice she is putting us at a table that is (wait for it) right next to a fountain. No really. And Mr. Little Man right away starts in with the strip and swim game. The players are giggling. I am, once again, HORRIFIED. In the interest of a peaceful breakfast and my own mental health I let him stick his feet in. I could not have dealt with a replay of Saturday's festivities. The compromise seemed to work, because he sat nicely, with his feet in the pool and didn't bother anyone. Sometimes you have to make concessions with your child.

Other tidbits that (thankfully) have nothing to do with nudity:
- Our hotel room had leather (LEATHER!!) wallpaper. It was awesome.
- On Sunday there was not a single person walking around without at least 1 article of Ravens clothing. Those folks are serious about their team.
- Who goes to Maryland and doesn't eat at least 1 crabcake? ME; which is odd because I LOVE crabcakes.

What I am reading: The enrollment form for Mr. Little Man's soccer league.
What I am listening to: John Mayer. AGAIN. Everytime he releases a new CD I immediately fall in love with it and listen to it non-stop for a couple of weeks. Then, I get annoyed and throw it in the stack, but when I find it again I remember why I liked it so much in the first place.

Transcripts, Pt.5

JL & I, via IM

Me: The man whose name shall go unmentioned is on IM. I am fighting the urge to say hi.
JL: Do NOT say hi
Me: I won't, but I am always tempted. I will send him a nude picture of myself instead.
JL: No. Send him a nude picture of me. Then he'll never go online again. :-)

What I am reading: How I Paid For College: A Novel of Sex, Theft Friendship & Muscial Theater by Marc Acito
What I am listening to: Jude - I Know

Its gonna be a great weekend

Mr. Little Man and I are going to Baltimore for the weekend. We have lots of fun stuff planned, but the highlight of the weekend will be the National Aquarium.

I am in the midst of packing my leopard print weekend bag (which I can use again because apparently leopard print is back in style) and I packed a jacket that I have not worn since last fall. I tried it on to make sure it still looked good on me and I found $25.00 in the pocket. Fo' real!

I do not know when I became rich enough to not notice that I was missing $25.00, but never the less this is a good sign. Its gonna be a great weekend.

What I am reading: The Fall Fashion Guide. I am OBSESSED with Fall fashion. I have pulled out all of my cashmere and suede bags and high heeled boots. That's right folks; I got my swagger back!
What I am listening to: John Mayer - Vultures. Its been on repeat for the better part of the afternoon.

I need a wife

Last night was back to school night at Mr. Little Man's school. The school "encourages" (that's code, ya'll) you to leave your children at home and our babysitter was busy, so Danny babysat instead.

Before I continue let me put to rest any concerns you may have for my love life. Danny is Mr. Little Man's godfather and one of my best friends, so let's not go there. He's the Will to my Grace; without the gayness and the fab NYC apartment. Stop emailing me about him. Although if you are a single woman between the ages of 35 - 50 who is looking for a delightful man you may e-mail me.

Anyway, Back to School night lasted significantly longer than I thought it would. There was a near riot due to the implementation of a new policy that (we) parents are none too happy about. I honestly pictured myself getting up and reciting Mario Savio's "Gears of the Machine" speech. After it was all over I called Danny to tell him I was on my way and I suspect I sounded a bit stress out.

Danny met me at the door with a beer and a plate of food and said, "tell me all about it". HOLY CRAP! This must be what it is like to have a wife. You have a crappy day, you come home and there is a hot meal waiting for you. Your child is happy and laughing and snorting milk out of their nose and you forget about all of the auxillary bullshit. Mr. Little Man had gone for a short dip in the pool, eaten dinner, played a bit with his toys and was watching The Jungle Book. He was happy and in a good mood and I had someone else to take care of me. It was a bit wierd, but in a nice way.

Now I am wondering where a girl like me can find a wife. Or at least a housekeeper.

What I am reading: The student directory for Mr. Little Man's school. After last night's near riot at school we are going to organize against the school district. I am keep a copy of the "gears against the machine" speech in my pocket. You know, just in case.
What I listening: Ray Lamontagne - Three More Days. When I imagine myself singing in a smoky blues bar this is the song I am singing.

Riley Finn wants to kidnap me

I keep having this reoccuring dream wherein (oh God, I can NOT believe I am about to type these words and admit this to the world) Riley Finn and an entire tribe of Maoris kidnap me and force me to do the haka on the 50 yard line at Giants Stadium.

Now, if you are not a COMPLETE dork and have to use the links to figure how completely odd the dream is / was, I apologize.

Also, if you could direct me to what the dream means that would be fab, because as much as I love Riley Finn if any member of the Buffyverse is going to barge into my bedroom every night I really need it to be Wesley Wyndham-Pryce.

Am I excited about Football season? OH, YES! But not enough to feel the need to learn a war dance. Much less do it in public.

What I am reading: The Fall TV schedule. I'll be watching BSG, House, Grey's Anatomy and , of course, CSI. I am giving Veronice Mars 3 episodes to redeem itself.
What I am listening to: Ben Harper - Better Way

Lost & Found

When I was 17 I moved out of my parents house. Mainly because I thought I was smarter than the rest of the population and I wanted to be "independent". I had a job at a warehouse, which was surprisingly alot of fun. One of my partners in crime there was Keith. We worked together for about 18 months and we actually spent alot of time together outside of work. He was one of my closest friends. We developed a pretty fierce bond because of our mutual hatred of anything that had to do with our boss; that's the kind of bond that doesn't break.

Eventually, I got off my ass and left for college and Keith and I just kind of drifted apart. And then I got this email (edited to keep out all of the embarassing parts):

"I was heading down to LBI and I passed an old house and I thought, "What the hell ever happened to Nadine?" I wasn't sure if you were Garner? or something else. You gotta love search engines! It sounds like you are doing very well. I was reading some or your blogs and I thought to myself, you are still the same Nadine - that's a good thing. I hope you know who this is by now? And your a mommy...HOLY SHIT!!! Well take care and hope to hear from you soon."

HOLY CRAP! I've been found; which I am excited about because Keith is a swell guy.


What I am reading: Marths Stewart Living - the September issue. The September issue is always the decorating issue. I look forward to it all year long and this year it is a total disappointment. It will clearly be trumped by the October issue which will be all about decorating your house for Halloween, which I, of course, LOVE to do.
What I am listening to: 311 - Amber