Sexual Harassment Induced Vacation Days

My boss just told me he pulled a muscle in his ass. Yeah, I'll let that one marinate for a minute before I continue.

This statement caused me to exclaim, "Why the fuck is that information that you think I need to know?" Just as he started to speak again I shushed him out of the room and closed the door behind him. I could hear him laughing as he walked down the hall.

What I need to know is this: can I claim this as sexual harassment? And more importantly in lieu of a lawsuit can they just throw me a couple of days of to recuperate from the mental image of what he was doing to pull a muscle in his ass?

Current craving: Copious amounts of rhubarb. When I was a kid my grandmother would give me a bowl of sugar and a stalk of rhubarb as a treat. I miss those days.